At seven years of age, I thought I had to go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life. This church going meant listening to and repeating the same prayers over and over. I had to be good and follow all the rules so I could go to Heaven. This left me with feelings of disappointment in myself because I could not seem to live up to the standards of the Ten Commandments and rules of kindness, patience, and goodness. I always seemed to have anger and frustration with everyone and myself. I hoped that there was something better than what I grew up with in my church. When I was 15 years old, my older sister asked me if I would like to pray with her and her boyfriend. I thought she was nuts. I felt very strange while they prayed. That night, I went to bed and could not sleep. I had a strong sense that God existed and cared. I said, "You really are there!" That was when I knew God could be close to me and cared about me. It was about one and a half years later when my sister came home from college and took me to a park. She told me how I could go to Heaven and be with Jesus forever. I prayed that day and asked Jesus to come into my heart.

It was not until I went to college and joined a Christian group called Navigators that I began to really understand what that decision meant. I was a sinner that could never please God on my own. I learned from the Bible that Jesus was the answer for everything-joy, help, peace, assurance of where I was going, and who I was, a child of God. I certainly did not become a perfect person! I made many mistakes, but the Lord was faithful to teach me and guide me in His ways. He has softened me (I was very harsh and blunt with people). He has helped me to see my anger and why I get so angry. He has made me stop, look and listen; where before, I would react and then regret my actions. I love living for Jesus. For me, there is no other life worth living.

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